130. Boundaries: The Trust Piece
How do you trust again after you have been hurt in a relationship? How do you know when you are ready to trust again? You and I, we all are drawn to each for different reasons, in different ways. Think about how many relational concerns are calling your attention each day; how often do you check your texts or your Facebook account, every day? How often do you think about your loved ones? Do you feel lonely without a connection? That's how God designed us to be.
These needs draw us in in different ways. The way you are connected matters. Healthy connections are created by you through healthy boundaries. Especially with your loved ones, protective boundaries allow you to connect with others in a respectful and responsible way. They add value and dignity to you and draw others into a healthy, respectful connection with you. They also show to others what you require in a relationship.
What are protective boundaries? Protective boundaries are about guarding your heart, your life, and what you value. They are healthy, honouring and accountable messages of what you will and will not do or tolerate. For example; "If I read comments on Facebook from you I think are hurtful, then I will unfriend you as a result." Regarding families; "If you continue to be late for meals, then the kids and I will eat together and you can find your meal in the fridge." "If you continue to overspend on our credit card, I will cut them up." "If you won't stop drinking (and/or using drugs), I will take the kids and move out." It's about being responsible for all aspects of you life and well-being.
You can learn more about protective boundaries in Townsend's and Cloud's book, Beyond Boundaries. Invaluable to read and keep on your bookshelf during tough times. Blessings, warrior!