112. How to Leave the Past Hurts Behind?
After a 15 hour flight from her country, Julie stepped off the plane. She felt a mixture of feelings of her new home land. Newly married to a citizen, she felt a sigh of relief knowing at least her entry to the country will be accepted. The large time change added to her exhaustion. Despite the mixture of feelings inside her, she warmly accepted her new large extended family, with her new husband at her side.
Initially Julie was thrilled for being able to "leave all the hurts behind." She dreamed of her wonderful life in a new country. Little did she understand how so many hurts remained.
Julie left abusive surroundings. Julie grew up in a war-torn country where she witnessed much death and violence. She disclosed to her brothers and his friends of her sexual abuse and the devastation of a group rape. Julie also spoke of her fathers alcoholism and her mothers passive behavior of choosing to ignore the obvious warning signs around her and in Julie.
When Julie was ready to deal with her past, she displayed signs and expressed symptoms of panic, high anxiety, depression, obsessive compulsive disorder, and spoke of dissociating in situations that caused her anxiety. Julie felt detached, apart and 'different' from others. Her hurts simply refused to go away as she had hoped.
As time passed, Julie discovered, in a profound way, the importance of healing. She visited her country suddenly as a blood relative of hers passed on. During her time in her old country, she met a childhood friend who had similar life experiences than she did. Her friend had refused all help. Julie's friend had re-treated back to childhood behavior, was unable to go forward in her life, was reactive and non-communicative. Their hurts had occurred nearly a century ago and she witnessed her friend just like she was way back then.
Julie chose to go forward in healing. She learned it will be like peeling layers of an onion skin. This, she learned, needed a full commitment for her inner and outer healing. It was a choice only she could make and adhere to.
What about you? Are you ready to leave the hurts of the past behind, so they will no longer hold onto you? Like an onion skin, peeling the many layers requires openness and sharing your hurts. It will fully be your own choice and your commitment to healing and no one else's. Results are life altering, as now you can face the world. You can do it Warrior!
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